The LORD in my HEART, a guitar and a knife – a true story!

My Lord In My Heart

Every living being, and every person, has seated next to us, seated next to us in our heart, the Paramatma, an expansion of God, Krishna. It doesn’t matter how sinful I am, how low a life form my body is, the Lord’s there beside me. I am not alone. We are never alone.

Because we are in this human form, and we reside in this body in the area of the heart, we often refer to the Paramatma as the ‘Lord in the heart’, sitting next to us.

Because I have been away from God for so long often it is hard for me to hear what the Paramatma is telling me.

The more I hear, sing and say God’s/Krishna’s names, the more my consciousness becomes clear and I am increasingly able to hear my Lord in my heart. God is there in my heart with me, acting as witness to whatever I do.  He is waiting for me to turn to Him, waiting for me to start the process of chanting and cleansing, and waiting for me to want to hear His instruction.

Of course, we must learn the difference between our mind and the Lord in our heart. God speaks through the heart.

The mind can come through with all kinds of voices, all kinds of ever-changing and constant chatter. Too much damage has been done by people who really believed they heard the voice of God ever so clearly, telling them to go burn down a church or something similarly crazy. No. That’s all imagination and hallucinations.

God speaks to us from the very core of our heart, our very being, and hearing Him within is a ‘knowing’ that something is right or not right. And we can know for certain that what we are hearing is truly God guiding us because it will always be consistent with revealed scriptures and the message of the acharyas, the pure lovers of God.

If I can learn to live my life tuned into, and having that internal relationship with God, my Lord in my heart, I’ll find that my life will be so much more peaceful.  There will not be anxiety about whether I am doing the right thing or not; I won’t be so caught up in the highs and lows of everyday life. I’ll increasing know from within what to do, and what not to do.

A DUMB DECISION!

 But ‘hearing’ the Lord in my heart and ‘knowing’ I should do something, and actually doing it is sometimes difficult.  With that in mind I give you this true story:

 One day not so long ago I was in the inner city picking up a vintage guitar I had repaired by a friend of mine, John Davies.  When you walk into his ‘The Guitar Repairers’ workshop, you could be stepping into a shop of 100 years ago. A great experience with sawdust and vintage guitars everywhere!


‘The Guitars Repairers’ shop/workshop in Brisbane Australia. A must see if you are a guitar enthusiast and visit Brisbane

I’d collected my vintage guitar and was putting it into its case when the double swing doors opened and in came this guy who had a heavy aura surrounding him. The room temperature dropped a few degrees as he looked around with bloodshot eyes. Besides the owner John, there were two other customers in the shop and myself.

The guy was tall and solidly built, with crudely tattooed knuckles and 2 teardrops tattooed just under his left eye. He sat on a stool next to me where I was putting my guitar in its case and started playing and singing quietly with a guitar he had picked off the wall.

He was quite a good musician, and, trying to breakthrough his dark disposition, I asked him if what he was singing was his own material.  He said it was, and that he composed it in prison. He volunteered that he just got out yesterday! With that I interrupted John’s conversation with his customers, bid him goodbye, and went out the door.  I looked around and the guy had put down the guitar and was following me.

We were just outside the shop door when he said “Can you give me a lift mate?”  I was caught unawares and said “I don’t know, I’m going back towards town”.  He said “Well, I need to go see my sister, just a few kilometers down the road, can you give me a lift mate?”

Now my heart started pounding and the message from the Lord in my heart was as clear as day, “DO NOT GET INTO THE CAR WITH THIS GUY!”  And here was the problem – in that moment I thought that this guy had probably been knocked back his whole life – the school of hard knocks as they call it. My head overruled my hammering heart and I said “OK”.

My car was parked out the back of the shop and I was later told by John, the shop owner, that he watched as we went to my car and he was saying to himself “Don’t get in the car with him Charlie, don’t get into the car with him Charlie!” over and over again.  But I did, all the time knowing this was the wrong decision.

He sat in the passenger’s seat next to me, which was pushed back further than mine.  Because I did not want him to be sitting that little bit behind me I pushed my seat back further.  He followed suit and pushed his back even further.

I drove off in the direction he wanted to go, thinking to myself “Now look at the situation I have myself in, this is a really dumb thing I’ve done!” Then I thought “Well, this is my own doing and I suppose if I am shot or stabbed it is probably going to be faster and overall less painful than dying from metastasized prostate cancer, so Krishna if this is the way I end this body, so be it”.  In one way, it was quite reassuring that I was not that worried about dying.

My dark friend in the seat beside me started asking questions “So is your guitar valuable? And what do you do for a living?” I decided to try and build up a rapport and talked about how the guitar I had was an old one and not worth much, and that I had six children and I was the breadwinner. Then I asked him about his guitar playing, saying I thought it was very good and had he thought about cutting a CD.  We talked like this for a time as we were getting further and further from the city.

Finally, I said “How much further to your sister’s place?”  He looked at me slowly and quietly, as if coming to a decision, and said “This will do here, pull over”.  So I did.  I did not know what to expect, but he sat for a few moments and then opened his door.  He put one leg out, and as he did so a large kitchen knife fell from his jacket and clattered onto the sealed roadway.  He stopped, picked up the knife with its 8” pointed blade, and looked over his shoulder at me with a look as cold as ice. I felt he was saying “You were lucky!”

With that he got out of the car, closed the door and with a slight laugh, walked away.

I said “Thank you Krishna!” I did a U turn and drove back towards the guitar shop.  I knew John would be concerned so I stopped in to see him.  He was pacing up and down and when I came through the door he said “What the f***! I cannot believe you got in the car with that guy! I called up your wife to see if you had a phone in the car to see if you were OK and I was just about to call the police!” Then I told him what happened he was even more stunned.

I have no doubt that that person went into the guitar shop with the intention of committing a crime, but found too many people there, so I was the next target.  Why he changed his mind in the car is anyone’s guess, but I like to think it was the Lord in his heart telling him “No!”

And the two tattooed teardrops under his left eye? I found out later they symbolized that he’d killed two people! My only mark on this world could have been a third teardrop on that guy’s cold-hearted face.

The lesson of the story:  listen for, and act on, instructions from the Lord in your heart.

PRAYER

My dear Lord residing beside me in my heart
For many lifetimes You have been patient with this unappreciative soul
Even though You are sitting right there beside me
I have ignored Your calls, ignored your guidance constantly

For some reason You have now directed me to Your humble servant
Jagad Guru Siddhaswarupananda
And he has opened my heart

Opened my heart so that I can begin faintly to hear Your sweet voice
Whether in this body or another, whether in this world or another
I need not fear, You are always there with me

Please let me chant and sing Your Names
with sincerity and enthusiasm, and place my heart and my hands in Yours
Please may I never again leave Your warm embrace

My dear Lord in my heart
Please let me forever remain in Your service
and in the service of Your dear friend
that Vaishnava giant, that illustrious yogi, my eternal Gurudev
Jagad Guru Siddhaswarupananda Paramahamsa Prabhupad

Thank you and Namaste
Chaitanya das/Charles Robinson

29 thoughts on “The LORD in my HEART, a guitar and a knife – a true story!

  1. I really love hearing and reading again and again this story. And I always laugh on this part, ” My only mark on this world could have been a third teardrop on that guy’s cold-hearted face.” But then again, it makes me think…what will be my mark in this world? or nothing at all…just a dust gone with the wind?

    Thank you very much for this amazing and awakening write-up.

    1. Thank you Amida, yes, and at the time it made me realize that we can go/leave these bodies, at any time. I often wonder also what happened to that guy. Namaste, Chaitanya das.

  2. What a story! We are so fortunate that Krsna decided it wasn’t yet your time! You where given another chance and you have used it to touch so many people lives! Thank you for sharing your insights and stories with us!
    So much love to you!
    Namaste,
    Rosita

  3. That is an interesting example of thinking we are being compasionate towards another person – but actually we are acting under the influence of the mode of goodness – and ignoring the Lord’s instructions (even though He always instructs us out of love and concern).

  4. Dear Charles( Chaitanya das) Fewww…close call with death and lesson learnt but it is an ongoing battle for me to hear the lord in the heart amidst the clutter in my mind and outside influences and emotions etc. your prayerful chanting of the holy names as you have described is indeed a real solution for us all.

    Thank you very much, my memory is not so good but I am sure I will remember this story and the nice prayer.

    1. Thanks Helen, yes it was too good a story not to make a post. I love the graphic my daughter did to illustrate it too.

  5. Great writing my friend, very easy to picture vividly each part of the story, you had me on the edge of my seat! I am grateful you survived to share this enlightening story and are here to now leave us with your mark in the form of this blog and most importantly your kind association 😉 Great graphic art from your daughter, was wondering who did that for you, is she professional? If not she could easily work in that field, but only if Krishna in her heart tells her too!!! Haribol soul 🙏🏽

  6. 😱 I’m sure he saw something special about you which made him change his mind, maybe even touched his heart and made it a little bit softer. I’ve heard other stories of victims just being kind and talking to the perpetrator and it changing their mind … even sometimes the direction of their life! It would be cool if that’s the case with this guy, but probably better next time to be kind from very far, far away!!! Also, I once got into a persistent stranger’s car when I was a kid and immediately regretted it. The Lord saved me too. As soon as he backed out, a police car was by our side. He’d been watching him drink and was ready to pull him over if he decided to drive. It’s good knowing that I’m in good company …. haha, I’ve felt so stupid about that for years!

    1. Hi Sachi…but you were a kid when you did that…..this was only a year or so ago for me and I’m in my late 60’s. But I’m pleased those cops where checking the guy out already for you sake!

  7. Hi Dex, Not sure what you are saying here? To me it was pretty straight forward, did he enjoy the situation, maybe, but I got the feeling he didn’t care if he went back to jail or not. Was I scared? Yes somewhat, but I don’t think I was ‘bounded’ by fear as you put it. All the best, Chaitanya das

  8. Wow, I’m so glad you are safe.

    In the future, only pick up ukulele players. We don’t carry knives and usually can’t carry a tune.

  9. Hi Charles.

    OMG! That was intense! Glad the story had a good ending and I didn’t realize this just happened recently.
    Love that prayer in the end that is just absolutely sweet!

  10. This story is a good one! The Lord in our heart is such a real tangible feeling, He communicates with such loving guidance. I pray to stop ignoring all of the “little” nudges He gives me so that I can begin to strenghen my ability to hear Him more and more.

    Thank you for sharing your prayer – so beautiful.

    Sending you my love dear uncle!

  11. How brave of you. You took compassion on this individual and gave him a ride. Just by befriending him on this short ride, this guy got the opportunity to go deeper in his heart and do some soul searching that you are one of a kind, caring and understanding. Unlike his world of cold prison wardens, inimical prison inmates, he found you like a light on his dark canvas, non judgemental and kind. I’m sure during the conversation you touched his soul. God brings enlightened spirit souls in different circumstances to uplift others and you sure were the one for this guy praising him on his guitar playing and believing in his ability. Thanks for sharing.

    1. Well, not sure I agree with you that I am that enlightened to be able to influence him like that, but thank you for you kind words… Caitanya das

  12. I absolutely love this story and have just re-read it again and it is a great story with a very important message, but I am just glad that you are still with us for a while longer. The mark you are leaving in this world is far greater than a small teardrop on a psychopath’s cheek, in my opinion. Love Yo’s artwork for this story and I love your prayer at the end as well. Regards and respects.

  13. What was the guitar you were having repaired? I assume it was actually valuable, or at least, has sentimental value to you. I feel you answered him honestly when saying that the guitar you had wasn’t of very high value, because in the end, it is just wood and metal. Your life has a much higher value and it was wise to direct his focus there. Amazing story and fantastic blog!
    When the time does come to leave off this mortal coil, do you have a post ready for your family to place on the blog? I only ask because I have read your other posts and I am hoping that you will have something to say in parting. Your forethought here and your words are very inspiring. In truth, leaving this blog is the ultimate way to have words in parting. Thank you for everything you write here.

    1. Hi Ron, I cannot remember what guitar that was but definitely was/is valuable to me. I’m sorry I have not posted much lately but hope to do more soon. Yes I have much to say leading up to leaving and leaving this world. Thank you for your words of encouragement, it helps me to want to write more. Namaste!

  14. Wow! A thought-provoking story…Kindness Defeated the Evil Mind! You’re a brave caring man not everyone has the courage to do that. For sure you unveiled and touched the heart of that person during the conversation.
    It’s just reminded me of the past (Tulsi my daughter was 9 years old that time) after dropping a friend at LAX airport my husband headed to the freeway found out the car was running out of gas, took an exit right away on one of the bad neighborhood in LA ( the time where the clashed/hostility of color of the skin happening) Went inside to the 1st gas station, I felt the tension people were giving him a bad look hearing words, “man you’re in a wrong place”. The same with 2nd, 3rd, 4th gas station the same no gas for him because of the color of his skin. Followed him with nasty words…I was scared, “let go back to the freeway with no gas” but he still persisted to the 5th gas station. This time was worst, about 7 men followed him and surrounded him. “Oh no! We have to help your dad” I told my daughter who was sitting in the back seat. I quietly grabbed a rattan stick at the floor of back seat gave one to my daughter. “We’ll fight back to back! Just hit the knee and legs, if they attack your dad.” Pray, pray Krishna please help us! Suddenly, I saw him talking to them, I can’t hear it…few minutes he walked back to the car followed by them. I opened the car window, he said to them “would you guys like to have some food?” I gave 2 plates of Prasadam that was supposed to take home…and they calm down. They allowed him to go inside the cashier for gas and they even helped to put gas in the tank. Another story of kindness defeated the evil mind just like your story! Thank you for sharing your story and letting me share my story too!

  15. Thank you Dhira dasi for your comments and your story. Yes a little bit of kindness goes a long way in this world. Many tanks again, Chaitanya das aka Charles.

  16. Wow! I heard you tell this story and was blown away at the time. You told it so cinematically. And to read it again now, and realise it was so recent, and in my town, which i had not picked up on in the first hearing, makes it that much more telling. Thanks for sharing again.
    So many times i have heard, but not been sure, so not followed, that gentle quiet voice of the Lord in my heart, and realised later my mistake, but never something as dramatic as this.
    I’m glad I came to reading this rather later than when you posted it as i got to read the comments also.

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